as i read through a few friend's blogs this afternoon i've come to the realization of just how real pain is in our lives. Be it pain in the lives around us as challenging circumstances threaten the safety and happiness of our loved ones or the brokeness and hurt that surfaces in our own lives.

Here I am; two challenges set before me. The first is to trust past what I feel, the second is to feel and to trust.

My first lesson and challenge came from the chest I painted this weekend. It didn't turn out how I initially desired, so I had two choices, I could continue to make adaptions and add layers until it yielded a desirable or acceptable product, or I could whitewash it and start over. In retrospect I wonder, could this be how our hearts are to the Lord. Sometimes the artist can adjust and realign, (and as life is a process I would imagine this to be a highly utilized option). Somtimes however, the coats of pain are so piled up that we need to be stripped down. Although from this side of the artistry we see brokeness and pain, the good artist understands the work ahead of him when he sets out and only strips a piece as far as is good and when it is beneficial. We must learn to trust, not to understand. and no, brokeness isn't usually convientently timed. Feeling hurt doesn't weaken my character, or defile who I am. Its okay to feel hurt.

My second challenge comes from what started as a confession. A boy telling an audience that he doesn't pray for his painfully dying sister. Praying would mean identifying and feeling her pain. Her pain was too great, however in that audience he was compelled. Compelled to feel her pain, and the pain of others. He was compelled to feel that he would be more compassionate and pray with an effectiveness only achieved in intercession (praying on behalf of another).

Through brokeness our pain could lead to the effectivesness that could change more than just our prayers.



To trust in a way that I cannon see; that's what faith must be